I've been running scared for 9 1/2 years due to 3 infections that nearly killed me in 1990, 1993 and 1995. All of them occurred after being hospitalized but I'm hoping that if I get the surgery done at the same hospital, they'll know exactly what to do if I spike a temp! Seems I always do that when in the hospital, which is why I'm scared stiff! I've decided however, to feel the fear and do it anyway.
This whole thing started when God whispered to me one day, "How is it that you were willing to trust Me with your daughter (who had cancer), all those years ago, but you won't trust Me with you?"
That one hit me like a ton of bricks! So, it's time to stop running and deal with my fear. The bible says specifically that fear is associated with punishment. "There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." (1 John 4:18).
The devil works us constantly when we have an irrational fear such as this one? It is kind of a risky surgery so he's workin' me double time right now. I wish this wasn't happening but I know that God is in control, which does bring a certain amount of peace to my soul.
I appreciate and pray for everyone who reads this blog and I apologize for being away for so long. Thank you for being so patient with me.
God bless you all. I hope you all have a terrific weekend!
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