God Help Me

There is one scripture that I've heard over the years that didn't really help me. That is, until I heard it in a different way from a different teacher. I'm just so grateful I took that course at my church, or I never would've heard it! 

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, let your mind dwell on these things!" (Philippians 4:8).

I then heard Kay Arthur of Precept Ministrires say something that changed my life forever at that bible study. 

She said we should Philippians 4:8 everything that comes into our minds. She said If the thought doesn't meet the tenant of that scripture, that we should "DUMP IT IN THE WASTE BASKET!" We're suppossed to "take all thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ!" (2 Corinthians 10:5), anyway!

God doesn't want us to be negative, scared, worried, upset, or to feel some other emotion the devil wants to throw at us to see if he can get us lowly little fish to bite on his hook! Once we do? He's back in control, so be very wary of your thoughts and the things you say! 

I've been suffering severe back pain/spasms since August 2007. I've lived in fear of surgery ever since due to a staph infection that keeps coming back. I nearly died of infections while admitted to the hospital after my last 2 children and another surgery I had to have. Each time, I was in the hospital for at least 18 days. I was fine afterward all three times, but I never gave God any credit! 

I was praying recently about my fear of the 3 spine surgeries I need and I heard Him say, "I got you through the first 3 infections. What makes you think I couldn't do it a 4th?"

The very first thought I had after hearing God say that was this: "Oh no! I've been LIMITING GOD!"

I know I've asked God to heal me about a million times, but I'm still not getting anywhere. Probably because I'm too stubborn and full of fear to do what I know I need to do in order to get better.

God? Please help me?